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Sunday, September 17, 2006

Postpartum Depression

Postpartum Depression, a problem encountered by women after they have given birth, should be extended to include what we are going through today.

The MIL has gone back to India. This simple sentence has a lot of ramifications than you would possibly imagine !

Jr. started right at the security gate in the airport, trying to go in without a ticket. Apparently she thought, she was also going to board the flight with grandma !! We werent aware of her plans. I had to literally carry a screaming, fighting kid from the security gate all the way to the elevator. When we were waiting for the elevator, a chinese (or korean) couple had a similar screaming baby. Both Jr. and that girl (around the same age) were screaming "grandma" in their respective languages and the fathers were holding the kids almost parallel to the ground! The two sets of parents mutually consoled both kids in the elevator, thinking "grandma is grandma" in Chinese, Korean or Tamizh ! Somehow the kids stopped, after they saw that someone other than their parents, were also convinced that grandma will return!

I came home and openend the fridge and was in for another shock. There was sambar, rasam, curries and kootu's, not to mention urugais, rotis etc. If there is an earthquake in our area, and we happen to be stranded in the kitchen for a week, I think we will still do fine. That sent me into depression (although I havent given birth recently, I do have sleep deprivation etc. etc.. the other causes that enhance postpartum). You appreciate people completely, only when they disappear!!

Mommy's sadness is obvious. Well we all thought at least baby is immune. I rock her to sleep in the night and she keeps reaching for my ears with her fingers, her eyes still closed. She was searching for grandma's ear ring!! Now I am seriously considering getting my left ear pierced and put on grandma's ear ring, in hopes that she will sleep quickly! The kids are both insecure as expected, worrying about when mom or dad will suddenly disappear next!

I guess this is a common phenomena in every immigrant household where the grandparents come to help with the kids, bond more with the kids than the parents, and leave when their visa runs out.

The good thing is that Jr. is at an age where she understands and the baby hopefully will forget and forgive us.

Here's to grandma !!


I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 11:10 PM, Anonymous WA wrote...

aaawww you are making me all teary now, here's to Grandmas

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 11:17 PM, Blogger Swatantra wrote...

Getting ear pierced is a nice idea.. as far my experience goes... these kids are very adoptive as compare to us... she will be fine .. All the best!!

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 12:27 AM, Blogger B o o wrote...

That was a sweet post.

>>You appreciate people completely, only when they disappear!! << - So true! :(

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 2:36 AM, Blogger visithra wrote...

awwww poor kids - n oh yeah poor u ;p hehe - it probably is normal given how much time she would have spent with them knowing there was a limit

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 4:05 AM, Blogger Balaji S Rajan wrote...


Though it is painful to hear that, Kids have a natural instinct to adapt themselves quickly. Probably it may take long time for us to come out of it. I do understand the situation. I have felt the same many times. These are the problems we encounter as immigrants. We need to give up for something else. Life goes like that.

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 9:17 AM, Blogger Adaengappa !! wrote...

Planning to drop the kid's at day care center ? esp.the little A ?
Sure,they would miss their granny for now :-(

Take care.

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 10:46 AM, Blogger Kavi wrote...

Grandmas are special ! Especially so for Jr !!

The best of shades will be best felt under the sun they say !!

I hope you are able to return to 'normal' quickly, and then as Balaji says, start the waiting game again !

I am not responsible for comments posted by others... At 11:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous wrote...

beautiful post...its so true!


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